


I Love The Way You Make Me Hurt

by Nadja_Lee



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Angst, Bottom Alec Lightwood, Breathplay, Dom Magnus Bane, Dom/sub Undertones, Fluff, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Insecure Magnus Bane, Kink Negotiation, Light Dom/sub, Love, M/M, Oral Sex, Possessive Magnus Bane, Power Bottom Alec Lightwood, Protective Magnus Bane, Romantic Fluff, Rough Oral Sex, Smut, Sub Alec Lightwood, Supportive Alec Lightwood, Top Magnus Bane, Understanding Magnus Bane
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:15:39
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,540
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25493731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nadja_Lee/pseuds/Nadja_Lee
Summary: Magnus had never wanted Alec to see this side of him; the side that wanted to make the Nephilim kneel for him and mark him up as his. He panics when he wakes up and discover how rough he got with Alec the night before. However, Alec quickly assures him that he wants and needs to give his surrender and wear the Warlock’s marks just as much as Magnus wants him to.A story of accepting your own needs, your partner’s needs and the many nuances of love. Basically, the most fluffy and emotional smut fic I’ve ever done.
Relationships: Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 60
Kudos: 859
Collections: Hunter's Moon Creation Exchange, Malace 101, Malec best





	I Love The Way You Make Me Hurt

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cloudburst_Ink](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cloudburst_Ink/gifts).



> Thanks so much to Monochromatize and Cindy for great beta work as always. Thanks so much to Brightasstars for the amazing story banner.  
> Chapter warnings: Breath play, anal sex, oral sex, referenced marking, marking, possessiveness, kneeling, kink talk. References to drinking, depression and self-harm as shown in season 3 for Magnus and season 1 and 2 for Alec.

_Please read the chapter notes for detailed warnings_

# I Love The Way You Make Me Hurt

*** * * ***

Alec smiled in his sleep, instinctively reaching for Magnus to snuggle closer. He felt drained and his body heavy in all the right ways, making him feel truly relaxed and refreshed for the first time in as long as he could remember. Lately it had been one crisis after another and Magnus being without his magic hadn’t turned out to be the fairytale Alec had imagined. Magnus was now living with him at the Institute after his attempt to regain his powers through Lorenzo had failed, almost killing him. Alec could tell Magnus was unhappy and it made Alec want to try and help in any way he could, to fix it.

Besides his constant worrying for Magnus then he was worrying for Jace, worrying for Clary….for what was coming. He didn’t seem to have just a few seconds of the day without responsibilities and duties. Back in the day he would have dealt with the pressure by over-training, finding escape in the pain, but he couldn’t do that this time. Magnus would worry when he saw the marks and Jace might feel it. While both Magnus and Jace knew he did this, as Magnus had once told him then he tried to escape emotional pain and turmoil with physical pain, then he also knew they always worried about him when he did do it. So that wasn’t an option. He had therefore been running on fumes, feeling like he might break at any moment, snap at someone….just yell loudly in the middle of the ops room to just get some release!

Last night though had changed all of that. Magnus had gone out drinking in the early evening before Alec had gotten off duty. It was something he did more and more lately and it worried Alec. Magnus still drank like a Warlock, which meant as he no longer had the same tolerances Magnus would really get drunk like everyone else and not just get a pleasant buzz. However, what really worried Alec was that it was clear Magnus wasn’t happy without his magic and now even without his loft. He was trying to think of something Magnus could do at the Institute, but it was difficult. Fact was that there wasn’t a place for a powerless former Warlock on the frontlines, and Magnus was dying staying on the sidelines. Alec felt guilty as he knew Magnus had done this for him; to save Jace for him. And even that hadn’t worked out well; Jace was struggling too. So, Alec was stretched thin trying to blow up the very ground he was walking on to help everyone. He barely slept or ate in his single-minded focus to find good solutions for them all.

When Magnus returned late yesterday evening Alec had been pleasantly surprised when he had initiated sex. Magnus rarely did that; always so mindful of his boundaries, always so soft and gentle. Yet Alec didn’t want soft and gentle. He wanted to **feel**! He wanted to stop worrying that Magnus would break, that Jace was dealing with the Owl aftermath, that Jonathan was out there, that Clary had to deal with all of that, that…In short he wanted to stop his thoughts, to stop worrying that the world would fall apart without him. He wanted to let go.

Magnus hadn’t been drunk last night, but he had had enough to drink that his barriers were down, he was more relaxed and easy going, less burdened by his overwise air of loss and sadness that being without his powers seemed to bring him. Alec exploited this rare moment to the fullest. Now that Magnus had started to show his dominance and his power, pushing him up against the wall of his room, he had edged him on. He wanted Magnus to show he wanted him. That he wanted this!

So Alec had pushed, pleaded and begged for more, harder, tighter, faster. And Magnus had given it to him and so much more. Alec had never thought he could be so turned on by being ordered to kneel for someone but when Magnus had done it …he had never been so hard in his life. He had never thought he would like the idea of being tied up, completely at someone else’s mercy. Yet when Magnus had tied him up he had never felt more free, more safe.

For every mark, every bruise, Alec saw Magnus leave on his skin he had wanted more! He wanted Magnus to show he belonged to him and only him! He wanted Magnus to show just how much he desired him, wanted him. Wanted this! He wanted all of Magnus’ passion and fire.

They had never done anything like this before. Magnus had always been so soft and careful, knowing he was Alec’s first everything. Until last night Alec hadn’t realized how much he had wanted this from Magnus. Not always but sometimes. He wanted to be able to let go and know Magnus would take care of him. To finally be able to empty his mind. He had never been so out of it after sex before, so drained and completely satisfied. He had never felt so owned; so loved.

Alec was surprised to realize as he slowly started to wake up that he felt so much better; refreshed and ready to take on all his burdens and responsibilities again. He no longer had to fight a need to over-train or something like that to find release. He was….happy. Satisfied. He smiled to himself.

“Alexander?” Magnus’ voice, sounding hesitant and a bit off woke Alec fully from his slumber.

“Hmm? Yes?” Alec asked, lifting his head as he looked over at Magnus, a smile still playing over his lips from remembering last night.

Alec felt oddly excited when he saw the mess that was their bedroom; clothes everywhere, the covers only half on the bed, the empty bottle of lube lying on the floor next to some training rope Magnus had found that he had used to tie his hands with…Alec’s grin turned into a frown when he saw the shocked and frozen look on Magnus’ face and how his hand had frozen halfway towards reaching for him.

Alec sat up in bed, mindful he was still naked so he kept the covers around his lower body to keep focused on what was wrong with Magnus. The Warlock reached out a hand and moved it over Alec’s jawline and down his throat towards his collarbone. Alec smiled as he leaned into the touch.

“Darling…oh, by Lilith!” Magnus exclaimed, sounding devastated and lost.

Magnus pulled back his hand as if burned, drawing further back, sitting up in bed with his back to the headboard, his arms fisting the sheets in frustration, the covers only on his lower body now.

Alec sat up next to him and reached out a hand towards him, but Magnus pulled away with a pained look, clearly finding it hard to meet Alec’s eyes.

“What’s wrong?” Alec asked confused.

“Your throat…your neck,” Magnus got out, a lump in his throat, nodding towards those areas. He then waved at Alec’s wrists and chest as he added with a look of self-hatred and shame, “Your whole body.”

Alec looked at the bruises left on his wrists from the rope, the red marks from hands on his forearms. He took a hand to his throat and felt the soreness there, certain he would have clear red marks from where Magnus’ hand had been around his throat last night, squeezing tight in just the right way for the combined pleasure and pain, dominance and control, to push Alec over the edge. Just remembering it made Alec have to fight down his beginning erection.

“What about it?” Alec asked baffled, hurt and confused by Magnus’ reaction.

Had he forced Magnus last night? Pushed him to do something he didn’t want to do? Alec was getting worried now too.

“I did that to you,” Magnus said agonized, nodding towards Alec’s bruises and marks.

“I know,” Alec confirmed, unsure where this was going.

“I’m so sorry,” Magnus said softly, pained, looking away from him.

“Why?” Alec asked bewildered, giving Magnus an intense look. “I have gotten more bruises than this sparring with Jace; particularly when he uses his angelic powers.”

Magnus didn’t seem to really hear him. He looked at him again, his eyes fixated on the bruises and marks on Alec’s body.

“Because…I can normally control it,” Magnus insisted as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair.

Magnus kept staring at the bruises, so Alec sighed in frustration and annoyance. He reached for his steele lying on the nightstand. He quickly drew two iratzes and the bruises and marks disappeared at once.

“See? All gone,” Alec said with a smile as he put the steele back on the nightstand, still unsure what was going on but wanting Magnus to feel better.

“It doesn’t change that I did that to you,” Magnus insisted, clearly still upset with himself.

Alec was starting to worry he had pushed Magnus too far last night. He gave Magnus a tender look filled with love and reassurance.

“I wanted you to. I liked seeing the marks last night and even more this morning. They stood out more clearly now,” Alec admitted, blushing a bit as he said it.

“I can normally control that side of me,” Magnus went on in a pained tone as if he was sure Alec didn’t know what he was saying.

“What do you mean control it?” Alec demanded to know.

“My demonic side seeks this dominance, this control. I thought I was controlling it. I didn’t want you to see this...ugly side of me,” Magnus said heartfelt, regret and sorrow in his eyes.

Alec shook his head at him.

“There is nothing ugly about you and I don’t see why this is particularly demonic,” Alec insisted firmly, moving closer to Magnus so their knees were touching but not reaching for him just yet, waiting for Magnus to calm down first.

“I am part demon,” Magnus reminded him, a hint of self-hatred in his voice at admitting it, saying it.

“I know. I always knew that, and I have always been completely fine with that. Whatever you feel or need, wherever it comes from, it is who you are, and I love all parts of you,” Alec assured him with a fond smile.

Alec’s warm support made Magnus relax a bit but also feel more guilty that his own desires ran so dark when Alec was so pure and amazing.

“I don’t know what is happening to me. Everything is spinning out of control and the drinking….” Magnus admitted softly, agonized, his voice dying out.

There was something in the way Magnus said it that made Alec realize he was not the only one who had needed release to feel better; so had Magnus.

“You are hurting and what we did helped you deal with that hurt, didn’t it?” Alec concluded, nodding in understanding.

“Yes,” Magnus admitted, struggling with himself to accept this fact about who and what he was. “Making you kneel, leaving my marks on you…the control you gave me makes it seem easier to deal with my life as it is now. To deal with the complete **lack** of control I now have over…well, my entire life.” He paused before he waved a hand at the bed they were sitting on as he added frustrated, “I mean even this bed isn’t mine!”

Alec put a calming hand on Magnus’ thigh and was happy when Magnus didn’t pull back.

“You are suffering because of me. I am so sorry for that,” Alec said heartfelt, pained.

Magnus put his hand over Alec’s on his knee, as always moved by his care and compassion.

“I chose to do this. To give up my magic,” Magnus reminded him.

“Yes, for me. Otherwise you wouldn’t,” Alec said knowingly, a hint of guilt and sadness in his voice at Magnus’ sacrifice. “You barely tolerate Jace. You did this for **me**.”

Magnus nodded, not seeing a point in denying it, “Yes, I did.”

“You are going through a lot; we both are. It’s more than ok with me for you to deal with that in this manner. In that way we **both** get something we need so that seems perfect to me,” Alec assured him.

Magnus looked intensely at him, trying to decide if he meant it, if he really understood what he was saying.

“You’re sure this darkness doesn’t scare you?” Magnus asked hopefully but skeptically.

Alec smiled warmly as he nodded, “I’m sure.”

Magnus lit up with optimism but needed to be sure, needed to make sure Alec really meant it.

“You are just so…” Magnus started to say, fighting to find the right way to end that sentence.

“Innocent? Sensitive?” Alec suggested with an eye roll and an annoyed handwave.

Magnus smiled at that as he nodded and added, “Pure.”

Alec gave a half smile at his words, both annoyed and moved by hearing and feeling the care and worry in Magnus’ tone.

“Maybe but I still know what I want and what I need,” Alec said strongly. He paused for a moment, reflecting, before he added, “I may be those things you said - I am young and you are my first everything - but I am the same I have always been and these needs I have….I know they have always been there. I have tried to deal with them in other ways but with you I can do it safely.” Alec gave Magnus a fond look as he went on, “You call it darkness, but I call it light. Salvation.”

Magnus smiled widely as he shook his head and proclaimed, “You continue to surprise me.” When he caught Alec’s eyes, he quickly assured him, “Always only in good ways, darling.”

Alec smiled back at hearing that, both of them reassured.

After a few moments Alec asked a bit shyly, hesitantly, “So, you have done this with others?”

“What we did last night?” Magnus asked to be sure they were talking about the same thing.

Alec nodded, “Yes.”

“Yes, but never like this, never with someone I loved. I always used to feel embarrassed about this side of me. That I liked doing this; liked making someone hurt,” Magnus explained honestly, looking down as he spoke, unable to meet Alec’s eyes.

“Oh,” Alec just said, feeling a bit disappointed he wasn’t the first Magnus shared this with.

However, after a few seconds of reflection he decided he actually liked he wasn’t the first. It meant Magnus really knew what he was doing and he guessed at least one of them should know since he hadn’t even kissed someone before meeting Magnus so he most certainly couldn’t contribute any experience when it came to bedroom activities.

“I…Did I force you? Did I make you feel unsafe?” Magnus asked hesitantly, worried, taking Alec’s silence as a bad sign.

Magnus was hanging on Alec’s reply, sure he could never survive if Alec said yes. He would rather die than harm Alec! He had seemed so eager last night, begging him, edging him on. But suddenly Magnus felt uncertain, needing to be sure Alec had truly meant it.

“Of course not!” Alec quickly assured him, his voice firm and sure, making Magnus relax with the strength in it.

Alec smiled reassuringly at Magnus as he admitted, “I was afraid I had forced **you**. Pushed you. I never wanted to do that.”

Alec hesitated, blushing a bit before he said quietly, avoiding Magnus’ eyes as he said it, “I liked it. What you did to me. What you had me do. I liked it all.”

“But… I hurt you and I loved it,” Magnus admitted, fighting to say it, to accept this was something that turned him on, that he wanted to do that to Alec, the man he loved more than life itself.

Alec looked at him then, his gaze loving and filled with understanding.

“I would hope so,” Alec said frankly, blushing a bit as he said it, but his voice was strong and sure.

“I left marks and bruises all over you,” Magnus reminded him.

“I wanted you to,” Alec assured him again, squeezing his knee and giving him a look filled with love and adoration.

“You like when people hurt you?!” Magnus asked directly, a hint of disbelief in his tone.

“Not people,” Alec assured him, blushing as he replied. “Just **you**. I trust **you** with all of me, also this.”

“So you have never sparred with Jace, edged him on to get that?” Magnus asked with a knowing look.

Alec blushed and looked away for a moment before he admitted, “Yes. I probably have. Or I have over-trained or something like that to try and starve off this need.” He paused before he added, “But I have never had what you gave me yesterday. I could actually let go. I could fall and be unafraid.”

“You shouldn’t want that from me. I am part demon. If I let this side of me out…” Magnus sighed as he added darkly, trying to scare Alec off by being direct, “That part of me loves to see my marks on you, your body decorated with my bruises. That part of me would even love to see you bleed for me.”

“I’m fine with all of that,” Alec insisted firmly, not scared at all.

On the contrary; Alec was getting excited and turned on at imagining Magnus wanting him so much, wanting him to belong to him so much as to do that.

“Really?” Magnus asked, raising an eyebrow questioning at him, fighting down the excitement and desire Alec’s reply was bringing him.

“I trust you. I know you would never do anything I didn’t want you to do,” Alec told him seriously.

“That’s a lot of faith to put in someone who has lost everything in just a few weeks; my magic and my loft,” Magnus warned with an air of defeat.

“Those things doesn’t define you! You are more than that,” Alec insisted strongly.

“Maybe,” Magnus said, not convinced.

“If you have done what we did last night before with others why are you so worried about doing it with me?” Alec asked confused.

“I have. That and more,” Magnus said matter of fact.

“Then why?”

“Because I never loved them. I love you,” Magnus said honestly.

“I love you too. I do really want this, Magnus,” Alec said just as honestly.

“You are Nephilim,” Magnus stated matter of fact.

“So what?” Alec asked confused, not seeing the connection.

“You want me to hurt you; a Downworlder,” Magnus said slowly, needing him to confirm it.

Alec blushed but still nodded, “Yes.”

“Why?” Magnus asked, curious despite himself, wanting to understand.

Magnus seriously doubted any other Nephilim would ever be able to let go like that to a Downworlder. But then Alec wasn’t like that. He had never cared that he was a Warlock.

“I’m not sure,” Alec admitted, frowning as he tried to analyze his own needs and feelings.

“As punishment?” Magnus suggested, well aware of Alec’s military approach and need for punishment when he felt he failed.

Alec shrugged, “Maybe.”

“Or ownership?” Magnus asked with a dark gleam in his eyes, putting a hand lightly on Alec’s collarbone, stroking his thumb over Alec’s pulse point in his neck, smirking when Alec’s eyes lit up with desire.

“Definitely,” Alec said huskily, beginning desire appearing in his eyes.

“I left bruises and marks all over you,” Magnus reminded him as he kept stroking his thumb across Alec’s pulse point, enjoying Alec’s reactions as he experimentally pressed a bit before loosening the pressure, marveling at how Alec leaned eagerly into his touch, wanting more, fighting to control a moan of pleasure at the possessive gesture.

“I know,” Alec admitted hoarsely, “I like it.”

“You do?” Magnus asked, a beginning grin playing on his lips, by now more asking to hear Alec say it than anything else. Beginning to believe him.

“I do,” Alec confirmed in a fond tone.

“Why?” Magnus asked curiously as he removed his hand from Alec’s neckline, making the dark haired boy almost growl in frustration at the loss of contact.

“My whole life has been filled with responsibilities and demands. Of huge consequences for failure. I expect punishment when I screw up and pain is how I am used to deal with failing,” Alec explained, able to focus a bit more on the conversation now that Magnus had removed his hand from his throat. “Right now, I have so much to worry about. Jace, Clary, Jonathan, the Seelie Queen….” He paused as he nodded towards him and added, “You.”

Magnus didn’t try and tell Alec not to worry about him; he knew Alec would always worry for those he loved and well, even Magnus had to admit he was going through a hard time at the moment.

“And when I hurt you, make you kneel, make you mine? That helps you deal with all of that?” Magnus guessed.

Alec nodded, fighting through his embarrassment to reply, “I know I can trust you. I can let go and push and be punished in a safe and controlled way. I know I can let go and submit, give you control. I can finally forget it all.”

Magnus looked at Alec in wonder and awe, taken back by his insights into himself and his own needs. Magnus was starting to realize he hadn’t been giving Alec enough credit. It was not Alec who needed to accept who he was and his own desires. It was more himself who needed to do that.

“I give you that?” Magnus asked hopefully.

“I came twice yesterday, and I don’t think I have ever come that hard in my life. Yes, you gave me that,” Alec assured him, giving the Warlock a fond look, his cheeks red as he spoke but feeling Magnus needed to hear it.

Magnus couldn’t help but beam proudly at hearing that.

“I liked hurting you last night,” Magnus admitted as he stroked Alec’s cheek. Alec put his own hand over his and leaned into the touch for a moment before he removed his hand. Magnus smiled warmly at seeing the loving look on Alec’s face. He withdrew his hand as he asked honestly, giving Alec a searching look, “Isn’t that…wrong? Fucked up? That I like leaving marks and bruises on you?”

“No,” Alec quickly assured him, shaking his head to emphasize his point and giving Magnus’ nearest hand a firm squeeze. He paused before he asked, “I want you to hurt me, to mark me. Isn’t that just as fucked up then?”

“I don’t know. Maybe?” Magnus admitted with a frown.

“Shouldn’t we be the judge of whether what we do is ok or not?” Alec suggested after a few moments of reflection. “Can’t it just be ok for us? Maybe this is what we need, what we both need, at the moment.”

“Maybe but how can I know if you want this for pleasure or you want punishment?” Magnus asked after considering Alec’s words for a few moments.

“It’s probably a bit of both most of the time and I think that that’s ok too,” Alec admitted after giving Magnus’ question careful consideration. He gave Magnus a strong look as he added, “You will just have to trust me as I trust you.”

Magnus was thoughtful for a few moments, considering Alec’s words.

“If and I say **if** we are doing this, we need to do it properly. Safely,” Magnus insisted, looking carefully at Alec as he spoke.

Alec nodded eagerly, “Ok.”

“First of all, we can’t do it when I’m really drunk and you shouldn’t encourage it in those moments. We have to agree on that. I can’t be so drunk I can’t properly evaluate your reactions if this is to work,” Magnus went on, his voice leaving no room for arguments.

Alec nodded at once, a bit turned on by the authority in his boyfriend’s tone after talking about all of this, “Ok.”

“Also, you need a safeword you will use to tell me to stop or slow down,” Magnus continued, nodding acceptance of Alec’s reply.

“I won’t need it but ok,” Alec readily promised.

“This is **not** an endurance test, Alexander,” Magnus cautioned, his eyes narrowing slightly in warning.

Alec bit his lower lip at the reprimand, blushing a bit and looked down for a second before he looked at Magnus again and nodded agreement.

“Ok, ok,” Alec promised. “What is the safeword then?”

“Your safeword is gold. Slow down is silver. Tap once for being let up and twice for slow down. If you don’t use these safewords when you need to then we can’t keep doing this,” Magnus ordered, his voice strong and sure, making it clear he was deadly serious.

Alec nodded again, feeling excited and more than a little turned on by the prospect that they would continue doing this. He hadn’t known since they had done this last night how much he needed this. Needed it to balance him out, to keep going. To carry the burdens of his office, of the people in his care. How much he needed to feel Magnus wanted him, desired him in such a primal way.

“Ok.”

“You **will** safeword,” Magnus ordered, a hint of worry in his voice as he emphasized the order, needing to be sure Alec understood he couldn’t and wouldn’t hurt him in a way Alec didn’t want to.

“I promise I will,” Alec calmed him at once, seeing his concern. He put a hand on Magnus’ nearest arm before he added, “But I am Nephilim. I can take it.”

Magnus squeezed Alec’s hand on his arm for a moment before letting go and Alec withdrew his hand.

“I know you can. That’s not the point. Promise me you will use your safewords for I need to hear it if we are to do this,” Magnus insisted, giving Alec an intense look.

“I promise,” Alec said solemnly, nodding to emphasize his words as he put a hand on Magnus’ thigh, giving a gentle squeeze.

Magnus smiled, letting his desire and eagerness at what was to come flare as he said satisfied, “Good.”

Alec hesitated for a moment before he let his hand on Magnus’ thigh wander further and further south. Magnus raised an eyebrow at him but didn’t stop him.

“You are sober now and my first meeting is not for another few hours. I could show you I mean it,” Alec suggested seductively, hopefully, leaning over, his breath hot against Magnus’ cheek, his lips inches from Magnus’.

Magnus’ eyes lit up with hunger and power. Before Alec had time to react he had caught his wandering hand in an icon grip around the wrist that was sure to leave red marks. Alec looked at Magnus’ grip on him and felt his arousal increase at the power and control, the strength in his grip and the knowledge it would leave a mark. Magnus had proven he could easily defeat him, putting his hundreds of years of battle experience to good use. Without Alec using his runes Magnus easily got the upper hand which was really turning Alec on; to see Magnus’ raw power like that.

“Could you now?” Magnus challenged, pulling him closer by the wrist he was holding on to.

The power coming from Magnus made Alec strangle a moan of desire.

“Yes,” Alec got out, his eyes dark with desire and his voice husky.

Magnus used his other hand to pull Alec close with a firm grip on his neck, crashing their lips together in a hard and possessive kiss filled with need and desperation. Alec eagerly opened his mouth to invite Magnus in, moaning into the kiss. Magnus moved his hand from his neck to fist his hair and pulled, forcing Alec to pull back from him. The forceful pull made Alec give a small noise of desire as pain and pleasure mixed, his eyes half-closed.

Magnus could see Alec’s eyes start to get hazy. He smirked as he felt his own arousal increase. Knowing from last night how it excited Alec to be manhandled Magnus released his hair and used his grip on Alec’s wrist to push him towards the edge of the bed.

“Get on your knees next to the bed,” Magnus ordered as he released Alec’s wrist.

Magnus really shouldn’t be surprised at how quickly Alec complied; he was a trained soldier after all so obeying orders was an instinct. Still, the Warlock was awed by how fast Alec was out of bed and on his knees before him, sitting next to the bed and looking up at him with eyes filled with awe and arousal. From this angle Magnus could also see how turned on Alec was; his erection clearly visible between his thighs.

“You do look gorgeous on your knees,” Magnus admitted with dark desire in his eyes as he rose from the bed, looking down at him.

Alec looked up at him with desire and love shining in his eyes, moving around so he was now kneeling directly in front of Magnus again. Magnus felt himself harden at the gesture, at how eagerly Alec was following his every move on his knees.

“Thank you, Sir,” Alec replied huskily, licking his suddenly dry lips.

Magnus almost moaned at the use of ‘Sir’. Alec had added it last night too and Magnus was really starting to enjoy hearing it from his lover’s lips.

Magnus fisted Alec’s hair and turned his face up, smirking when Alec hissed against the painful pull while his eyes darkened with desire and his cock hardened further between his legs.

“I have this power over you,” Magnus marveled, feeling his excitement increasing at seeing Alec’s reaction.

“You do,” Alec confirmed, his voice hoarse with desire and need.

“Even now? Without my magic?” Magnus questioned, his own insecurities coming to the forefront.

Alec would have nodded if he could. Instead he simply looked up at Magnus with all his certainty and love.

“Yes. I love you. I admire **you**. Not your lineage or your magic or anything else. I wish to surrender to you, **you**. As you are. You are perfect to me, perfect **for** me. Just as you are right now,” Alec insisted strongly.

Magnus couldn’t help but smile, his heart melting at hearing that, his insecurities and fears settled for the moment.

“I love you, Alexander,” Magnus told him lovingly as he bent down, his lips close to Alec’s.

“I love you too,” Alec assured him before Magnus stole his breath with a kiss that had both of their desires skyrocket.

Magnus smirked in satisfaction when he saw how breathless and out of it Alec already seemed when he pulled back.

“Now, be a good boy and get to work,” Magnus ordered, arousal and love in his tone as he used his grip in Alec’s hair to force him towards his hard cock, holding it ready with one hand.

“Please. Use me hard. Show me how much you want me. I want to be so hoarse from sucking you that I will have to use a rune to be able to speak properly at my meeting!” Alec begged, blushing as he said it.

However, despite still feeling embarrassed at admitting to what he wanted Alec felt secure now, after their talk, to admit it, to ask for it; beg for it. Just as he had reassured Magnus he wanted this then he knew Magnus wanted this too. They could both express their desires and needs freely without judgement.

Alec looked up at Magnus with pleading eyes, licking his lips lustfully as he looked at Magnus’ cock, already pulling forward to what he knew was coming next. Alec smiled in victory when he saw Magnus’ eyes darken at his words, certain he would be getting everything he had asked for and more. In that moment his desire mixed with his love and he felt grateful he had found a boyfriend who satisfied all his needs so perfectly.

“Oh, I will!” Magnus assured him with dark seduction as he pushed Alec down and onto his cock, making Alec take him all the way down at once.

Alec put his hands on Magnus’ thighs for leverage and moaned as he let the Warlock use his mouth, Magnus using the hand in his hair to pull and push him where he wanted him, at the pace and depth he wanted. Alec moaned around Magnus’ cock in his mouth in pleasure, loving how he could give Magnus this, that he could please him like this. He felt his mind start to go blank and there was nothing but this. He didn’t need to think or worry or take any decisions; he just had to obey. To feel. He could finally let go.

Above him Magnus finally gave in to his own desires and needs. There was no pain or fears. There was just this moment; this high Alec was giving him. The love and trust, the power only Alec could give him. Magnus felt equal measure of love and desire as he marveled at how fortunate he had been that after searching for hundreds of years he had finally found someone to love who loved all parts of him so completely as Alec did. It was as if Heaven or Hell had taken one piece of a whole and broken it into two and then let them find each other.

In this moment they were both free.

They had continued giving and taking what they needed from each other, desperation and need, love and pain mixing and blending into one. It was explosive and it was everything they both wanted and needed. They continued exploring this new side to their relationship until Magnus had gotten his powers back and went to Edom. After that it was as if things had changed.

They had been married for a few weeks now and Alec could tell how happy Magnus was to have his magic and his loft back. To have him back. Magnus hadn’t initiated anything rough since then and Alec hadn’t pushed the matter. He himself was calmer but still felt the burdens of leadership and now he had to help Jace find a way to get Clary back. Until that happened he needed to distract Jace from his feeling of loss. There was always demands, burdens to bear. However, he didn’t want to put Magnus in an awkward situation where he felt he had to give him this, give him this type of love, if Magnus’ own need for doing what they had done was no longer there.

They had just snuggled into bed after a long day, Alec putting his head on Magnus’ shoulder and laid an arm over his chest. Magnus was absent-minded stroked his hair, making Alec want to purr with contentment. Alec had just been about to close his eyes when Magnus broke the silence.

“Alexander, I have been thinking…” Magnus began thoughtfully.

Alec lifted his head so he could look at him, making Magnus remove his hand from his hair.

“Yes?” Alec encouraged.

Magnus hesitated before he looked Alec in the eyes, carefully observing him for his reactions as he asked, “Do you want to continue doing what we did? You know…”

Alec smiled widely; he knew precisely what he meant. He almost wanted to scream in joy; Magnus **did** want to continue! Just the knowledge, the thought of that, made Alec have to fight down his beginning erection. He had missed this so miss. Missed letting go; missed feeling Magnus’ power over him.

“When you didn’t have your powers and you dominated me? Left marks on me?” Alec finished for him, trying to hide his eagerness and not really succeeding at all.

Magnus smiled fondly, thinking he was going to get the reply he wanted as he confirmed, “Yes.”

“Yes. By the Angel; yes!” Alec said enthusiastically, nodding to emphasize his complete agreement.

“Really?” Magnus asked to be sure, his smile widening and turning more and more predatorily.

“Yes!” Alec said firmly, making sure to look into his eyes so Magnus could see he meant it.

“Good,” Magnus said satisfied, smirking sexily at his husband in that special way that always turned Alec to mush.

Magnus leaned over Alec, making the Nephilim roll over onto his back. Magnus smirked as he made Alec spread his legs to give him space between them. Alec’s eyes darkened further with lust as Magnus sat up on his knees between Alec’s knees, just admiring his husband’s body. The hungry look in the Warlock’s eyes made Alec blush even as his arousal increased.

Alec looked excited and eagerly up at him when Magnus with a snap of his fingers had removed their boxers which was the only thing any of them had worn to bed. Sex was certainly easier with magic and having tried living without magic Magnus now fully appreciated how useful it was on a day to day basic.

“You are so beautiful and all **mine**!” Magnus proclaimed as he started to fondle Alec’s cock and balls, making Alec moan with desire, his cock quickly coming to full hardness.

“All yoursss…” Alec started to reply just as Magnus with a teasing look bent down and took all of Alec’s cock into his mouth.

“By the Angel!” Alec got out, overwhelmed by the amazing sensation as Magnus expertly sucked and licked at his cock and balls.

“So good,” Alec moaned as Magnus started to move up and down on his cock, fisting the sheets to try and get some kind of leverage.

Magnus pulled off his cock with a loud _pop_ and gave him a satisfied and smug smile, his eyes filled with lust and desire as he said, “I want to tie you up with my magic, have you completely at my mercy. Would you like that? To be completely mine to use as I see fit?”

Alec knew Magnus was giving him a way to back out if he didn’t want that but just the idea of being completely at Magnus’ mercy, having his magic hold him like that…. His cock leaked precum at the thought.

“Yes, please!” Alec got out, nodding to add to his plea.

Magnus laughed joyfully and stroked Alec’s cheek, putting a finger to his lips and moaning when Alec licked it, sucking at it.

“Always so eager to be mine,” Magnus got out in a voice filled with awe and desire, his own desire going through the roof at hearing Alec’s agreement.

“Always,” Alec swore.

“You are always mine! **Always**!” Magnus promised as he snapped his fingers and Alec found his hands being moved above his head.

Alec looked at Magnus with lust-filled eyes and crossed his wrists as soon as his hands were above his head, seeing how the submissive gesture had Magnus’ cat eyes appear in desire and pleasure. Alec moaned when he felt and saw magical red/yellow rope seem to tie around his wrists and tie his hands to the headboard. Experimentally Alec pulled at the magical ropes, but they felt firm, already leaving small red marks that had Alec’s desire increase at this proof of Magnus’ love and claim to him.

“You are perfect like this, spread out before me,” Magnus admitted in a voice filled with desire as he for a few seconds just admired his husband like this, all spread out before him, looking eager and increasingly desperate for his touch.

“Please,” Alec got out, needing Magnus to touch him, to do something.

“You beg so prettily,” Magnus complimented.

The compliment made Alec blush and his desire increase. Before Alec could respond Magnus had attacked his cock again like a thirsty man finding water in the desert, making Alec lose all sense of thought, reducing him to whimpering mess of pleas and moans. When Magnus felt Alec struggled to hold back any longer, he pulled off Alec’s cock, giving the Nephilim time to take a few deep breaths as he struggled to starve off his orgasm.

“Put your hand on my throat. Please,” Alec said huskily, his eyes shining with desire and need, blushing as he said it.

Magnus’ cat eyes appeared again in his passion and he put a hand to Alec’s throat, just resting there. He massaged against Alec’s throat, finding his pulse point, smirking when Alec moaned, the sound making Magnus’ cock react in response.

“Squeeze. Please,” Alec begged desperately when Magnus kept his hand on his throat, his touch light but heavy enough for Alec to feel he was there but not as heavy or as tight as Alec wanted.

“Like that?” Magnus asked, feeling his cock hardening at Alec’s easy surrender.

“Tighter!” Alec begged or demanded; it was hard to tell.

Magnus did so and now he had to moan at the blissed out look on Alec’s face when his hand tightened enough to leave marks on Alec’s throat. Needing to be inside his Angel, **now** , Magnus snapped his fingers and quickly had lube on his free hand. He knew what Alec liked when he was like this so he didn’t waste time on gentle; none of them wanted gentle right now. He started to fuck Alec with one finger first and quickly worked his way up, making Alec moan sinfully as he kept trying to press down and take even more inside himself.

Magnus claimed Alec’s lips in a sloppy and possessive kiss that was bruising and demanding and everything Alec wanted while keeping one hand on his throat, swallowing Alec’s moans of pleasure. Magnus quickly adding more fingers, opening him up for him. When he felt Alec was properly stretched and properly desperate Magnus withdrew his fingers. He magically lubed his cock, not having the patience to find the bottle of lube in the bedside drawer. He positioned himself at Alec’s entrance, waiting for the small nod from Alec before he slowly started to push inside his lover.

“Fuck!” Magnus got out when he was surrounded by Alec’s tight heat, fighting to go slow even though Alec was trying to push down to take more inside faster.

Alec gave Magnus a look filled with playful desire as he locked his legs around the Warlock, trying to force him to give him more, to go deeper, faster. Magnus gave him a look filled with desire as he let Alec have precisely what he wanted, pushing all the way inside in one fluent movement. They both moaned with desire when Magnus was fully buried inside Alec.

“More! Please,” Alec got out, moaning as Magnus started to move, hitting his prostate and making him shiver in desire, his cock leaking precum.

“By Lilith!” Magnus got out as he started up a brutal rhythm, hitting Alec’s prostate each time.

Magnus kept one hand on Alec’s throat, leaving some lovely red marks and the other left bruising marks on Alec’s hip as he used it to be able to get more leverage. It was impossible to tell which of them loved Magnus’ marks on Alec the most; Alec loved to have them decorate his skin and Magnus loved to see them there. Wanting to leave more marks Magnus leaned over Alec and sucked as many hickeys into Alec’s skin by his neck and shoulders as he could.

Magnus wasn’t sure what was driving him fastest towards the edge; the feeling of being buried inside Alec, the way Alec was eagerly trying to take more into himself, how gorgeous Alec looked tied up, his wrists already having red marks from Alec’s eager pull against the magical ropes - or the way his hand was tightening around Alec’s throat, leaving marks there, the trust in the gesture intoxicating to a level that nothing else could ever compare to.

“Come inside me. I want to feel it dripping out of me. Please,” Alec begged, his voice weak and raw from Magnus’ tight hold on his throat, his eyes dark with need and arousal, his cock heavy between his legs.

The words, the way Alec tightened his muscles around Magnus’ cock…

“Fuck!” Magnus got out as he tightened his hold further around Alec’s throat, cutting of his airflow and seeing Alec’s eyes roll to the back of his head.

Magnus thrust harshly into his lover, his husband, a few more times, hitting his prostate and sending waves of pleasure through him.

“Come now!” Magnus ordered just as he felt his own orgasm overtake him.

Knowing what would push Alec over the edge he released his grip around Alec’s throat, making the Nephilim take a huge breath of air just as Magnus came deep inside of him.

“By the angel!” Alec cried as he came explosively, untouched, all over their stomachs, the combined sensations too much for him to hold back.

Magnus removed his hand completely from Alec’s throat, smoothing the marks left behind by his hand with his fingers. He smiled smugly at the faraway and hazy look in Alec’s eyes and the silly grin on his face, knowing he had done that to him, he had given him that freedom, that peace, that bliss.

Magnus pulled out of his lover as carefully as he could. With a snap of his fingers he had them both cleaned up and removed the magical ropes holding Alec’s wrists together. Alec kept his hands where they were, a blissful look on his face. Magnus gently lowered each of Alec’s arms, massaging them as he did so and soothing over the red marks from the magical ropes. He laid down next to Alec and pulled him close against his chest, putting one arm around him to keep him close and safe. Alec made small contented noises that Magnus found adorable and snuggled close.

“That was…. So amazing and out of this world,” Magnus said breathlessly, enjoying the high left from his orgasm.

“Hmm,” Alec agreed with a silly post-orgasm smile, feeling floaty and out of it.

Alec would have nodded if he had the strength. Instead he just snuggled closer.

Magnus smiled and stroked Alec’s hair tenderly, seeing the bruises left on his throat and neck and feeling proud he had done that, that Alec had wanted him to, trusted him to.

Magnus snapped his fingers and had a glass of juice in the hand he didn’t have around Alec.

“Darling, drink this,” Magnus ordered tenderly, holding it to Alec’s lips.

“Hmm,” Alec just said but instinctively obeyed, rising his head up and drank it all with Magnus’ help before he snuggled back against his shoulder.

Magnus put the empty glass on the bedside table before he pulled Alec closer to his chest.

“I love you,” Magnus said emotionally, kissing the top of his head.

“I love you too,” Alec said satisfied without lifting his head from Magnus’ chest, his voice still sounding a bit weak and sore but there was no mistaking the satisfaction nor the love in it.

“I am so lucky I get to call you mine,” Magnus admitted possessively, lovingly.

Alec blushed a bit before he turned slightly so he could look into Magnus’ eyes.

“I want to do this again. Not always but sometimes. Do you?” Alec asked hopefully, smiling at how used and raw his throat still felt, how his voice still sounded weak and low, enjoying this reminder of Magnus’ love, his power, his claim.

“I do,” Magnus assured him, smiling tenderly. He paused before he added, “I just thought….now that I have my magic back…”

“What?” Alec asked confused when his voice died away.

“I have so much more power than you do now. It’s different than when we did this before,” Magnus warned.

“I know. I trust you. I always trust you,” Alec insisted in a loving but certain tone.

“Are you sure? With my magic you would truly be in my power. Complete surrender. Complete trust,” Magnus went on, trying to hide how turned on he was at the thought they would do this again.

“I want that,” Alec assured him, his expression serious and sure, the words alone enough to excite them both.

Magnus smiled at the thought as he reminded his husband in a fond tone, “You are sure? It’s ok to say no. We don’t ever need to do it again if you don’t want to. You have told me a lot that you love me for me but I love you for you as well, you know.”

“I’m sure and I love you too,” Alec confirmed, blushing and smiling happily at the romantic words. He paused before he winked as he added, “Also, sex magic is rumored to be the best!”

Magnus laughed fondly as he said, “You’re incredible, Alexander.”

Alec smiled at hearing that.

“At times I really do believe that. Now. Because I have **you**. Because you let me be free. You gave that to me,” Alec told him gratefully after a few seconds of reflection.

“You gave me my feeling of self back. Your love and trust, your surrender…you have made me whole in a way no one ever could,” Magnus said emotionally.

“I know you; I trust you. I kneel for you, I surrender to you. **You**! Not your magic, your father, your title. For **you**!” Alec insisted strongly.

“I know. After we first did this then yes; I do know that. I feel that and that means the world to me,” Magnus said, heartfelt, stroking his cheek lovingly.

“I love you,” Alec said softly, emotionally.

“I love you too, darling. Always,” Magnus assured him.

Alec’s eyes shined with adoration as he put Magnus’ hand over his and moved it so it was lying lightly over the bruises he had left on his neck and throat.

“I like to wear your marks. I feel safe, owned. Free,” Alec told him honestly, blushing a bit as he said it, but his voice was strong and certain.

“I love knowing you trust me like this. That you want me so much. No one has ever made me feel so free, so trusted, so appreciated….so powerful as you do,” Magnus replied with awe and wonder in his voice.

Their eyes met and in them was a shared passion and trust, pride and need associated with those bruises decorating Alec’s skin. Magnus now loved to see them on Alec’s body as much as Alec loved having them there; they both felt comfortable with leaving them there.

Alec smiled as he snuggled close to his husband, his smile widening when Magnus tightened his arms around him, holding him close. He felt safe, loved, desired. He dozed off in Magnus’ arms, knowing he was safe, that Magnus had him. He felt secure in the knowledge that Magnus would be there for him in any and all ways he needed just as he would be for Magnus. Always.

**The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave a kudos and a comment if you enjoyed it (or just a kudos). It would really mean so much to me.  
> You might enjoy some of my other Dom Magnus/sub Alec fics, like for example:  
> Broken Angel series: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1602028  
> Captive Angels; Victorious Demons: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21499168


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